Today the Gift Shoppe is offering the latest in high-tech advancements, it's more than just a phone, an MP3 player, a GPS, and a computer. It's the caring mother you always wished you had, instead of the indifferent daycare provider who actually raised you! It's guaranteed to rid you of your feelings of alienation and loneliness and replace them with the warmth and security that come with the illusion of always feeling "connected," a feeling you probably haven't had since birth!
Not to mention the security that comes from knowing you own a product that's "in," and the increased sense of importance and self-worth from realizing that lots of other people wish they too had it, and are willing to stand in long lines for the privilege of purchasing it!
The GPS feature not only tells you how to get to wherever you want to go, but perhaps even more importantly, it also tells you where you already ARE (and tells US where you've been)!
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